Friday, January 18, 2008

Logan turns SIX!

Six years ago today at 4:12 am, our lives were changed forever as our sweet baby entered the world with a pull in lieu of a push. In the hustle and bustle of the busy OR, I almost missed it when our doctor announced, “It’s a girl!” My tears flowed like chocolate milk off the edge of the table and I repeated, “It’s a girl? I can’t believe it’s a girl!” again and again. The relief on daddy’s face was palpable as if we finally had come to our long needed u-turn and our lives would again begin moving in the right direction. It may not have been as clear cut as that, but it did happen with time. The medications I’d been on had taken their toll and there were lots of things that had to work themselves out. Whatever. It didn’t matter anymore, she was here, and she was our focus!

She had curly, dark hair, beautiful blue eyes and the smallest fingers and toes imaginable. Her tiny little face was battered and bruised from her sideways attempt at getting out into the world the traditional way – you could say her face was “coned.” An extra heartbeat caused them to rush her away to the NICU before we even got to hold her, but it resolved itself soon and by 9:30 am, we got her, all to ourselves and named her Logan. She was strong from before birth, from all that she went through in there, and our other choices just didn’t do her justice. She was already different, already a survivor.

From her first moments, Logan has done amazing things. She is smart and sweet and intuitive and talked around eleven months in understandable words. She waved to the crowd at church on her baptism as if we had rehearsed it for months. While at day care between the ages of 1 and 2, the day care provider credited her with teaching a fellow 21/2 year old “classmate” to talk. Her preschool teachers said that she obviously sees the importance of being a friend to all, always including everyone happily, but having the strength to stand up for herself when needed. She is loving beyond words and showers us all with kisses and “I love you’s” by the hour. There is not another person on Earth who is more ticklish or who wants to be tickled more. She is a good and helpful big sister and completes any “helping” task with enthusiasm. For as much as she loves school, she does not like to get out of bed on school days – but hey, who doesn’t have a flaw? (Just kidding, she’s human, no doubt!)

For all of us who gladly make up Logan’s inner circle, she transformed us into new people. She made us Mommy and Daddy, Grandmas and Grandpas and uncles and aunts. She added dimension to our worlds and brought light and love to us on a silver platter from heaven itself. She made us all so much better.

So at 4:12 am today, well, I was actually asleep. I had thought my motherly instinct would rouse me, maybe a few minutes early with time enough to sit on the edge of Logan’s bed and watch as she turned six. Yeah, the internal alarm clock was a tad off and I woke at 5:20 and made it there a little late. And there she was, my six year old – it seems unimaginable that so much time as passed so quickly. She was on her back, mouth slightly open, in cozy puppy PJ’s with her covers half off and her American Girl doll in a cradle butted right along side her. Her curls wildly framed her face, her thumb no longer an issue; she was a baby and big girl in the same instant. My dreams for her filled the room, my eyes filled with tears; my heart fills with more love every moment since she entered our world. My God, we have been blessed.

1 comment:

Mary said...

Touched to happy tears ... This was and will always be an extraordinary day - the kind that makes the world smile with joy because a miracle, who happens to be known as Logan, arrived!